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Labeling yourself from bad examples can affect self-esteem

Labeling yourself from bad examples can affect self-esteem

Beliefs are pillars of support for our personality. They guide our decisions and behaviors in all areas of our lives, determining what seems good, bad, possible or impossible.

Since we were born, we are collecting mental constructs based on what we have learned from our parents, relatives, friends, teachers , colleagues and even television, with books, newspapers and magazines. This knowledge has great potential to go through the whole life of the person. A good example is how strongly one ties to a particular religion, social or sports position, which we learn as children.

As a child, the child is "open" and curious to discover the world and can be highly influenced by others. In this way, the labels with which she identifies herself (I am beautiful, I am intelligent) or with which she identifies other people (she is boring, they are evil) are formed. If this child finds no counterexamples along the way, these labels become self-actualizing beliefs and prophecies.

The more attention given to these defects we believe we have, the more we reinforce it within ourselves.

Such a powerful weapon can be used positively or negatively. There are beliefs that provide positive results, such as Neuro-Linguistic Programming assumptions: "we have all the resources we need," or "if anyone was able to learn something, I am."

Others are beneficial depending on context. for example, it may not be legal when the situation demands a little proactivity. There are others, however, that hinder much more than they help, such as "I do not do anything right", "I am incompetent", "I do not know how to deal with money, " I can not lose weight, " I only attract the wrong people. "Does this sound familiar to you?

The more attention given to these defects we believe we have, the more we reinforce it within ourselves. the first person, that is, "I am ..." In this condition, we are directing our thoughts at the level of identity, and so we are definitively labeling ourselves, making it more difficult to transform this situation .

Being labeled a failure can lead to failure for all areas of life, both professional and social and affective.

By changing the level to behavioral, to "I am ...", however, we make mental terms. The expression implies that this condition is for this moment and must pass or change soon. The greatest risk of years and years of enforcing these standards is that it is increasingly difficult to stop believing in them. In this case the person ends up finding defects even when there is no concrete evidence to support such a belief, thus creating less objective evidence. Labeling yourself as a failure can lead to failure for all areas of life, both professional and social and affective.

The easiest way to weaken a negative belief is to challenge it by finding counterexamples that show reality. An example is to imagine: how can I be a failure if I have been successful before? At most I am failing, which does not indicate that I am going to fail again.

This ultimately diminishes belief and recreates a new meaning for more positive and productive patterns.

Another very effective way of changing these paradigms would be to find people with more productive thoughts and behaviors.

It is important to focus on the positive and to treat ourselves. It is important to focus on the positive and to treat ourselves. with a little more affection, so we will find the most beautiful thing in life: to live.


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