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Self-esteem is key to end-of-relationship recovery

Self-esteem is key to end-of-relationship recovery

You are a mature, well- With the life. Perhaps he has already broken a marriage, but he has recovered and is whole, enjoying his "solitude contente", as Ivan Martins said in his Época column.

Suddenly, in a totally unexpected moment, he knows someone who awakens a passion as I had never felt before: the chatter flows, the energies vibrate in total harmony and the looks seem to see beyond the visible. The feeling is that they have known each other for a long time - what about another life? In a short space of time, they build their intimacy and know much more about each other than they realize.

Despite opposing lives and different habits, both discover that they have the same values, desires, and dreams. A force "from the hereafter" unites them, without explanation - after all, not everything in this life needs to be explained, do you agree?

Night-to-day, the feeling is that they are already part of each other's lives. Each banal event is shared in a complicity never experienced before.

With each encounter, the desire to be together is greater, which is hindered by the lifestyle of each one: the distance between the dwellings (what would be us without text messages and cell phone?), the usual running of work, children, home, family ... Each one already has its structure assembled and properly organized without space for major changes. Where do we fit into this already well-known and adapted rhythm?

When we fall in love we have the chance to become better, happier, more accomplished, and healthier people. Or not. Sometimes we imagine that a new love can take away the emotional balance already achieved. Another impediment to a surrender to this feeling may be just the opposite: the lack of an emotional structure necessary to play everything that involves a relationship to two.

Being a couple is being willing to give up certain habits, just as be open to the fundamental exercise of putting yourself in the place of the other to seek to understand it in your needs and feelings. From that moment we need to think about "we", not just "I".

When we fall in love, we have the chance to become better, happier, healthier people. surrender yourself to a new experience no matter how positive it may seem to you, for we are complicated, resilient beings, we are afraid of the unknown, we want certainty and assurance of success - as if that were possible!

Why not Try the new one that strikes me as appealing? Why escape the overwhelming intensity of a feeling that brings out the desire to go around telling people that life is beautiful and love is beautiful?

Those who have fallen in love know that the sensations experienced are the best possible. The smile appears on the face every moment whenever the image of the other comes to mind.

Everything gets more color, problems are seen more lightly, we lose hunger, we sleep less, we get more disposition, we get more more willingness to take care of our body and we wish that the time flies to simply arrive the moment of being able to look and touch the face of that being so special and powerful.

It becomes powerful in that it brings to the surface the best of we, the most positive, delicious, light and kind feelings. The person in love brings a special gleam in the gaze that denounces his happiness to the least sensitive and observant.

The human being has the incredible ability to go through the most tragic traumas and rise up, when it is his will. Anyway, this is wonderful and all the people of the world should go through this experience at least once in their lives to understand something that, however described, only makes sense when lived.However, we know that passion is an early stage of the relationship, which motivates the couple to want to get to know each other so that, through time and coexistence, they can build what we call love. The problem arises when, during this experience, one of the lovers fails to reciprocate the feeling of the other, frustrating the initial expectation that they have been made for each other.

Suddenly the blue sky changes to grayish clouds. The colors lose their intensity. The songs become sad. The loose smile disappears. Dreams no longer make sense. The will to take care is not the same. Problems regain weight. The days go by. And finally, a pain takes hold of the chest as if to remind us that our heart is there, broken, bruised.

That's where we have to take care so that all the energy directed at this feeling so pleasurable that it was frustrated do not become a depression, letting us be led by a deep sadness that completely unbalances us, undermining the will to do anything other than cry for the lost loved one.

The human being has the incredible ability to pass through the more heavy traumas and rise up, when it is his will. The point is this: we have to want to get out of this and resist the temptation to deliver the points. Some times are very difficult, because when we are involved in the pain it seems that we will never be able to stop feeling it. But we know that everything in life passes and even the most painful sufferings have their days counted to end.

With this in mind, try to face the end of a passion as the possibility of beginning a new phase, focusing on your things, not forgetting to take care of yourself, dedicating yourself to work and to what you enjoy doing. In reacting to the emotional balance, of course, life will move in the best way.

And finally, I quote from a thought by Fernando Pessoa: "As long as we do not go through the pain of our own solitude, we will continue to seek each other. To live the two, before, it is necessary to be one. "


Consumerism reflects difficulties in making long-term choices

Consumerism reflects difficulties in making long-term choices

Usually this desire appears strongly in childhood or perhaps pre-adolescence: who does not remember the feeling of wanting to complete an album of cards? Who could have forgotten the "excitement" when opening the package bought in the bank and check if the cards came repeated? Who did not feel the most when he got "hard" badges that everyone wanted and even behaved right to make money from his mother, father, grandfather, uncle, even the janitor, to buy more and more figurines until he filled everything up - last and long-awaited figurine.

(Well-being)

WELLNESS

WELLNESS

According to research conducted by University of Michigan researchers in the United States, a short snooze, approximately one hour long, is enough to help reduce impulsivity and deal better with frustrations. The survey had 40 participants, ages 18-50, and was conducted in two stages. In the first one, after three nights of normal sleep, the participants were subjected to computer tests that could not be solved, so that the students could analyze their reactions to the frustration of not having completed the task.

(Well-being)